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Fathers Who Harm

Father's Day has become a more highlighted day of celebration than when I was a child. My father was born in 1927 and lived a pretty long life: he died in 2013, a few months into his 86th year. He was not a bad father. He did struggle with alcohol addiction and was imperfect in other ways, but he was basically loving and kind. He was a workaholic, so we did not have access to him for emotional affirmation, but he told me in his old age that he always loved everything about us kids and felt sad that he had not been a better parent, and he was sorry he was most of all that he had not spent more time with us.  Other men in my family– my grandfathers, my husband, son, uncles, brother– have all shown themselves to be good guys and have adult children whom they love(d) and who love them back.  But I think to myself, having been a social worker to women and children who fled lives with men who put them and their children through Hell, that there are probably a fair number of children, te

5 Traditional Christmas Fruit Cakes Vegan-ized

When I was a young married woman, eons ago, the making of the Christmas cake (or "fruit cake," the recipes also interchangeable with "wedding cake") was still a big tradition in many families. The recipe ingredients included a lot of dried fruits-- some that looked and tasted not anything like the original fresh fruits-- and the usual feasting culprits: sugar, dairy, eggs and alcohol.  The preparation that went into the cakes generally involved a lot of soaking (in alcohol) that could extend to many days.  With all the ingredients in, your typical fruit cake was dense and heavy enough to be used as a door-stop, if need be. There were "light" and "dark" fruit cakes in my family.  The light cakes probably used less soaked fruits and were baked for a shorter period of time?  The dark cakes had a slightly bitter, burnt taste.  I preferred the light cakes that my Auntie Geneva baked every year and sent out.  They were sweeter and tended to h